The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls.
Pablo Picasso
Here are some tips how to trick people into thinking that you are an expert in art.
If you see a lot of people and they look normal, it’s Bruegel:
If the paintings have lots of little people in them, but also have a ton of crazy stuff, it’s Bosch:
If everyone in the painting has enourmous asses, it’s Rubens.
If the images have a dark background and everyone has tortured expressions on their faces, it’s Titian:
If all men look like cow-eyed curly-haired women, it’s Caravaggio:
If everyone, including the women, looks like Putin, then it’s Van Eyck:
If everyone looks like hobos illuminated only by a dim streetlamp, it’s Rembrandt:
If you see a ballerina, it’s Degas:
If there are cupids on the paintings, or you can easily add some, it’s Boucher:
All is dark, contrasted, and everyone has this peaked face with a beard, it’s El Greco:
If every painting is the face of a uni-browed woman, it’s Frida:
If everyone is beautiful, naked and stacked, it’s Michelangelo:
If a person lacks some bodyparts or, has an excess of them and those bodyparts are not where they are supposed to be, it’s Picasso:
If There is a rave of colours and people are happyRenoir:
If There is a rave of colours and people are unhappy, it’s Manet:
The “Lord of the Rings” scenery and curly-haired people, it’s Da Vinci:
If looking at the painting makes you think that you are on drugs, it’s Dali:
If all you see is an excel sheet with coloured squares, it’s Mondrian: